Forrin Invasion Week 1

Look Ah Kong, I have a keyboard

This week, I am mainly going to watch the Ashes at Edgbaston

Multiple packets of curry powder, spices, herbs, Malaysian treats later, the Mary Poppins' esque bags continues to yield surprises

Back to that keyboard.....

Daddy has got the power tools out again, hence the ear defenders

Read me a story, Ah Kong....

Ah Ma's turn

Ah Kong on dress the monster duty

Let me at those olives.....Want more olives

Sunday Lunch at the pub

T-0

Today is THE day. Now is THE hour. The time is now.

They have arrived. Ah Ma and Ah Kong have been reunited with T and the tired Trio are making their way back to sunny Gloucestershire via the biggest car park in the world, the M25.

The foreigns landed a whole hour early and managed to look innocent enough to clear immigration with the same hour of landing....which meant that they were standing, waiting for the ride home before they were even due to land in the first place.

And now I wait. Munchkin is still fast asleep oblivious to what is on its way. Words are not enough to describe the excitement I feel. The house is just about presentable but by no means spotless not that they will notice as the 2 pairs of eyes that burst through the door will be more interested in the Munchkin who after his BIG sleep this afternoon might just still be up to see them.

The Anti Milky Bar Kid

Tipping my head back like this is the only way I can keep mummy's glasses on my face

T-6

The household has been in preparation at a time when Ashes fever has also dominated. However, important things first This is how you stand

This is how you hit the ball

This is how you wait to run

The little cricket bat you see has a bit of a history behind it. It is about 30 years old. It was bought when a little girl was old enough to play. 2 years ago, it found its way into a suitcase and crossed many oceans, miles and miles away. It arrived in England in July 2007 and was presented to the little girl again (now not so little) for her newborn boy. And now it is his turn to play. And play he will when his coach arrives on Saturday!

(Not) Melodious Munchkin

Munchkin has been experimenting with song. 2 tunes dominate, Twinkle, twinkle little star and the Battle Hymn of the Republic.

Lyrics vary and are very changeable

Today I am mainly

Paintin'

Hmm

Munchkin has been given a very lovely deep sea diver figure by the two little misses formerly of Houston, Texas.



Today, he figured out that the diver's mask and air line come apart.



Munchkin: Mummy Look, the frogman mask is come off!

Mummy: Let's put it back on, poor man can't breathe!



Munchkin wanders off then comes back into the room with his daddy



Munchkin: Quick daddy, put mask on the frogman. Quickly daddy, poor man can'tbreathe. Will DIE!

2 girls and a little monkey

Due to a Poppins' predicament, the Munchkin and I are home today. But we are certainly making the most of it and having a whale of a time at the pleasure dome that is Chief Oracle's house.
So what have we been up to? Well......

We have been driving in the car

We have been on a voyage on the choppy high seas which really rocked the boat
We have been sitting on the steps waiting for the train to take us for lunch

And we have been falling in love.

Not bad for a few hours work. Not bad at all.

Starting 'em young

Woohoo! 1 week 6 days and counting till the foreign invasion. While T busies himself with accomodation improvements i.e. finishing off what we started many moons ago, I decided (following a consultation with Ah Mah) to start conditioning the Munchkin.

I think I will let the following describe whether or not my little experiment was successful.

Caution: The following scenes could contain loud chomping and snuffling in the manner of a ravenous piggy.

Mmmmmeeee Hoooooon!
Ooh! Dropped a bit. Don't want to waste it.

And now for the sound effects......

Not very chatty due to being a little preoccupied with the task at hand

Do as you are told

Munchkin was in the bath today minding his own business when his father noticed some little slimey friends in his nose.

Daddy: Blow your nose, Munchkin.
Munchkin blows his nose
Daddy: Do it again, harder!
Munchkin blows his nose again
Daddy: Go on you cn do better than that!
Munchkin REALLY blows his nose
Daddy: Urghhhhhhhhh!
Munchkin: That a bow-giiii, Daddy. A big one

On Daddy's hand was a baby slug....complete with slime. Nice.

The things children say

We met up with some friends and their lovely 3 month old daughter for coffee and cake today at a local garden centre. The little one was feeling a little crabby today so there was a bit of a lung workout when we got there. There was no comforting the poor little thing, she was inconsolable.
Amidst the tears, a little voice pipped up,

Munchkin: Don't like that noise! Don't like it.
Mummy: It's fine...she will be ok in a minute
Munchkin: Get it
Mummy: Get what?
Munchkin: Da ear defenders. At home. Clamps hands over ears in a very dramatic fashion

Later in the evening, during his bath, Munchkin proceeded to do some pretty interesting things with certain part of his anatomy which would, bring tears to the eyes of a grown man

Daddy: What are you doing?
Munchkin: Pullin' it
Mummy: What are you pulling?
Munchkin: (giggling) Weee weeee (thrusts hips in a suggestive fashion)
Mummy: I don't think you should, what do you think it is?
Munchkin: Tee hee hee is a Hose Pipe.
(Parents collapsed on the floor beside themselves)

Gender bender

Munchkin: Mummy's a sleepin' beauty. Is Luffly
Mummy: Awww! Thank you, darling. Does that mean Munchkin is a handsome prince?
Munchkin: NO. (very firmly)
Mummy: No? Then what are you then?
Munchkin: Is a PRINCESS! (Big smile on face, very pleased with self)
Mummy: A Princess? I think you are more like a handsome prince, don't you?
Munchkin: NO. Is a PRINCESS!
Mummy: Why are you a princess, Munchkin?
Munchkin: (H)as a handbag.
Mummy: !!!!!!!

Munchkin's Muddles

Mummy: What are you doing?
Munchkin: Push the foot stool here, Mummy. (points)
Mummy pushes the foot stool to the designated place - exactly
Munchkin: Fireman rescue 'im. From fishies.
Mummy: Ok, darling
Munchkin: Oh no! Fireman been sick on the floor
Mummy: Oh dear! What happens now?
Munchkin: Go get a wet wipe. Clean it all up (exits room to get a wet wipe)
Mummy: All ok now?
Munchkin: All clean now. Is better. No more comot boy.
Munchkin: Cleaning fireman's hell-mutt. Fireman was sick on fireman's hell-mutt.

One week, 7 days......

It has been a bit of a warm week. It has been a long week. It has been a very trying week....'eck it has jus been one of THOSE weeks.

For a start, Munchkin who has been sleeping through the night since he was about 8 weeks old has been fussing at bedtime. We realise that we have been very lucky with him, we realise that good things always come to and end and we also realise that we are here to lay down the law. So back to controlled crying we went with, touchwood, favourable results. Now controlled crying is not everyone's cuppa tea. It works for some and not for others and it is NOT for the faint hearted.

Night one saw about 15 minutes of screaming, shouting and thumping before all was quiet. Night two saw the same except the drama went on for all of a minute. Tonight will be night three. We shall see. What touched me was the number of people that dropped me a line to say everything is going to be alright, the number of people that gave me the reassurance that we are doing the right thing and the number of people who got in touch just to say " I hear you, I feel your pain....been there done that and survived - and you will too!"

So to all my pillars of strength, partners in crime and fellow "cruel" parents.....thank you! Let's just hope that we aren't creating little monsters but rather nurturing little characters who know not to mess with mummy!